Here’s the real reason you are attracting haters, how to reduce the amount of negative comments you are getting, and how to stop caring what people think of you.
If you’ve ever put yourself out there as a creator or an entrepreneur trying to help people, no doubt you’ve had your fair share of haters or negative comments.
This can feel really hurtful and actually prevents and stops a lot of people from ever starting a business or sharing their message with the world.
So why do we get these hateful comments? And is there anything we can do to prevent them?
A lot of people will tell you that these hateful comments are nothing whatsoever to do with you, that these haters have problems. They are jealous of you, and you should feel sorry for your haters as they are obviously leading very miserable lives to inflict their misery on other people.
And while all of this is true, this is not the real reason why you are attracting haters.
Today You Will Discover
- The true reason why you are attracting haters
- What you can do to prevent yourself attracting haters
- How to stop caring what other people think about you
- How to rise high above imposter syndrome
- How To Be Grateful For Negative Comments
- How To Respond To Negative Comments
My Name is Kath Kyle. I lead the Hustle-Less, Manifest-More Movement.
- I Help Entrepreneurs and Creators Manifest Business Success Through Spirituality, Strategy, And Success Rituals
- I Help You Master Your Marketing, Manifest More Money, And Build Your 6+ Figure Business on your terms Using My Dream Business Framework
What Are You Struggling With?
Have you ever attracted hate online? Or maybe you’ve been too scared to put yourself out there because you’re afraid of what people will think and afraid of any negative comments you might get?
Let me know by leaving a comment on my blog, YouTube channel or send me a DM on Instagram @kathKyleOfficial.
Let’s change your struggles into solutions now…
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The Real Reason Why You Attract Haters
What I’m sharing with you today is actually the contents of one of the lessons in my course, Dream Business Manifestation. I thought this lesson had the potential to help so many people, so I just had to share it with you today as a free gift.
Here’s the real reason why you attract haters, and you’re probably not going to like this…
The real reason you’re attracting haters is because the haters are mirroring back hatred that you have for yourself that you’ve repressed.
The reason haters are picking up on your energy is because we all have a particular energy that we project out into the world, which has been proven by science. This energy can be felt over the other side of the world and through the internet.
All of us have aspects of our personalities that we don’t like. That is human nature and we can’t avoid this. We have positive and negative aspects of our personalities. Or at the very least, we decide that the aspects of our personalities are positive or negative, but everyone would disagree on those things.
When we repress parts of our personalities that we want to hide, that is called our shadow. Whatever shadow parts of our personalities are hidden gain power and energy and can be felt by other people.
So when we have hatred for ourselves and we push this away and pretend it’s not there, it will come out in the form of hatred from someone else.
That’s why people with low self-worth attract people who treat them badly.
And people with high-self worth attract people who treat them very well.
A lot of the time these negative comments that you receive are very specific.
Instead of declaring that your next negative comment is just generally offensive and that person has issues, ask yourself the following question:
Is this something that I believe about myself?
A lot of the time it is very enlightening that people get negative comments that are a direct reflection to what you actually believe about yourself.
Have you ever wondered why some people seem to get so much hatred and others get very little?
It can often be a reflection on what people are thinking about themselves.
I’ve had my own share of nasty comments left on blog posts, YouTube videos, and social media.
I used to get really upset about it and feel like a victim. I would often dwell on the comments for days thinking “How could someone think that about me. That’s so horrible.”
But looking back, almost all of the comments were things that I actually thought about myself.
I once got a negative comment that said “Your gums are massive. Your teeth are so disgusting and I’m sick of you always trying to push your products on me all of the time”.
This one really hurt me at the time. I thought how can she be so heartless as to criticise my appearance and things that I have no control over.
But now that I look back with new eyes on the situation, I see that these are thoughts that I was thinking about myself at the time. I hated my teeth and gums and I was worried that I was being too salesy and pushy when it came to my business.
Another comment I got was on a blog post all about me sharing how drinking smoothies benefits your life as you don’t have to do so much washing up. This woman said that I was very lazy and not a good mother.
That comment really hurt me but now that I look back, I was suffering from Chronic Fatigue Syndrome and didn’t have the energy to look after my kids properly as I could barely move. I constantly felt guilty about it, felt like a bad mother and worried that people would see me as lazy.
So these negative comments all first originated from my own thoughts which I had suppressed.
Two Different Types Of Negative Comments
There are two different types of negative comments:
- This is the type of comment that really upsets you. The thought goes round and round in your head for days and you can’t shake it off. The reason why this comment hung to you like a bad smell is because the thought is already there deep inside yourself. Finally your negative thoughts have reared their ugly heads and you can start to deal with them. This is actually a good thing. So we should actually be grateful for our hurtful comments because they awaken a part of us that we had hidden and help us to own our repressed thoughts so they stop hurting us.
- The other type of negative comment is the type that doesn’t affect you at all, usually because it’s not true at all or it doesn’t apply to you. It seems like they actually got the wrong person because it’s blatantly not true. For example, say you get a comment that says “Men with blonde hair really annoy me” and you are a woman with brown hair. That blatantly isn’t a comment aimed at you. This is a bit of a silly example, but it’s really all about how you feel when you get the comment. If you are able to just shake it off and say “doesn’t apply to me” and not give it another thought, and not get emotional at all about it, then the comment is probably nothing to do with you or what you are projecting to the world.
What You Can Do To Prevent Yourself Attracting Haters
Here’s what you can do to prevent yourself attracting haters in the first place.
For a start, you can start to redefine the words you are using to describe negative comments.
Instead of saying that you are attracting haters, why not stick to the facts, that you have received 3 negative comments last month. It removes emotion and opinion from the situation which removes the amount of energy you are giving to the situation.
When you keep affirming that you are attracting haters, you will attract even more haters as this is now your current reality.
If you stick to stating facts, you are not making anything true about your reality. It was something that happened in the past and you don’t expect it to happen again.
Another thing you can do to avoid attracting haters is to increase your self-worth and stop hating yourself.
Decide that you are worthy of anything you desire, that you love yourself, you like yourself, and you don’t have any hate for yourself at all.
Whatever negative things you’ve been telling yourself and repressing, decide that you’re going to own them instead, and remove all emotion from these thoughts too.
Say for example, that you see yourself as a lazy person, turn it around and keep it more factual.
Why do you think you are lazy? How do you demonstrate being lazy? Is it a preference you have? Are you comparing yourself to someone else?
Instead of describing yourself as lazy, why not say that you love to have a work life balance, and love nothing more than vegging on the sofa watching movies, that you’re not the most active person in the world, but you really enjoy relaxing.
Stick to the facts and own them. Talk about them to other people and bring them to the forefront.
If you own who you are, nobody else will be able to make you feel bad about yourself again.
Then every time you get a negative comment, if you feel emotional about it, journal about it, and ask yourself what thought you repressed that might have attracted this comment. Turn your thoughts around again.
Very soon you’ll find that your emotional negative comments are reducing, and people won’t be able to make you feel bad about anything as you are owning all aspects of your own personality already.
How To Rise High Above Imposter Syndrome
Are you too scared about what other people think about you to put yourself out there?
This is really going to help you.
We are going to turn things on its head so you see things in a totally different light.
Are you worried that people are going to think bad thoughts about you?
Did you know that the main reason why people think badly of you and write negative comments is because they are envious of you?
You have probably heard that before that haters are envious of you and it is true that this is often the reason why they are leaving negative comments.
You may have attracted some of the comments, and that is your part of the energy, but what about the other person’s energy? Why do some people have negative thoughts about people and others don’t?
If you think about it, they are reading your post in the first place. That means they are interested in your content.
And while they are consuming your content, they are picking up on your energy at the same time as feeling envious.
They would never admit that they feel envious and it actually presents in the form of anger towards you.
However, they aren’t actually angry at you.
They are angry at themselves.
They are angry because they want what you have and they don’t have it.
The reason they don’t have what you have is because they think that you have a personality trait that they themselves have, but that they have repressed.
So the next time you see a negative comment, the reason from their side that they are leaving that comment is because they are actually inspired by you.
So while you are dealing with your own issues that have arisen from the negative comments, also know that at the same time you are inspiring people.
So this should encourage you to share your message, in spite of the fact that you are getting negative comments. It should be fuel for your fire.
Say for example someone says “You are flaunting your wealth in people’s faces” that is a sure sign that they are envious of you, and are inspired by you. It’s just come out in the wrong way because they aren’t aware of their own shadow side.
Being envious of other people actually means that you desire what they have AND you have the skills to be able to do the same thing yourself.
But those leaving negative comments would never be aware of that.
But now you are. And now you know that whenever people are drawn to you but also annoyed by you it is because you are actually inspiring them.
Didn’t you want to share your message to inspire people? Getting negative comments is actually a sign that you are inspiring people funnily enough.
How To Be Grateful For Negative Comments
Could it actually be possible to be grateful for negative comments? I believe that we can be grateful for everything in life, as we can learn a lesson and grow from all perceived negative circumstances if we look hard enough.
Next time you get a negative comment that triggers you, there are two reasons you can be grateful for it.
- You can be grateful for it because it’s highlighted some of your own repressed thoughts that you can now bring to the surface. You can work through these issues and let go of them. These are big blocks that are in the way of your success, and when you let go of them you will see massive improvements in your business and in your life.
- Another reason you can be grateful for any negative comments is because it means that your marketing is actually working, and you are reaching people with your message. You are inspiring people and provoking emotion within them which is waking them up to things that they have to deal with themselves. You are helping them start their own journey of self-discovery.
How To Respond To Negative Comments
Whenever you get a negative comment, your instinct will be to react defensively. You will naturally feel angry and might lash out at the person who has left a negative comment.
What I suggest is that you don’t respond to any negative comments for at least 24 hours until you’ve had time to calm down and do some journaling around it.
When you’ve had time to calm down you might be able to see things in a different light.
One interesting way to respond to negative comments is to respond with gratitude. You could say thank you for bringing that to your attention and really mean it, then you could even go one step further and wish them well on their own journey to get the outcome that you have yourself.
If negative comments contain profanity or abuse, I simply delete it and sometimes report it and block that person. There is a difference between a negative comment that causes you to stop and reflect on yourself, and actual abuse.
Even if you don’t engage with the commenter, you can still journal about how the comment provoked emotion within you.
We should see ourselves as worthy enough not to put up with abuse. After all, you control your own channels and have the ability to delete comments that are abusive in nature. If someone leaves a comment on my channel that I would be upset if kids read, I delete it. That’s just me. I like to keep my content and comments suitable for all ages. Sometimes I can hear my daughter’s voice in my head saying “Mummy why would you allow someone to talk to you like that” and if I hear that in my mind, I delete the comment.
And although we can be grateful for negative comments, you probably don’t want to actually work with people who leave you negative comments as they have a lot of work to do on themselves yet and they won’t be ready to accept your help, but it does mean that your content is reaching people and helping them. Their envy of you is all part of their journey and the first step to them recognising what they want to change in their own lives.
So next time you are worried what people will think of you, remember that you are much further along your path than most people, and the majority of people will be inspired by you and learn from you.
Those few who are further along the path than you are will cheer you along because you don’t get to be successful by tearing down everyone else along the way.
Most people are too scared to put themselves out there, so why would you be scared what terrified people think of you?
The way in which I approach haters is the same way that I approach all aspects of my business, from a spiritual and balanced point of view.
I also use manifestation and spiritual practices to get results for myself and for my clients.
I am just curious, have you ever tried manifestation before and you couldn’t get it working for you?
Have you ever tried to manifest results for your business?
A few years ago I was fed up, overworked, and business strategies and manifestation techniques just weren’t working for me.
After a lot of experimentation and some soul searching I finally discovered where I’d been going wrong.
Once I learned how manifestation actually works I was able to feel confident to start a business that I’d been putting off for years, and manifest the doubling of my business revenue on my passive business that had been static for a really long time.
I have shared my system for manifesting more revenue, more customers, more ease and flow, while doing work that you adore working the number of hours you choose, all without any hustling or striving in my signature course called Dream Business Manifestation.
I take you through a 30 day journey from manifesting being the person you want to be, to manifesting your dream business, and manifesting the money you desire to make .
I’m also SO excited to share my masterclass with you called Double Your Revenue Masterclass.
If you’ve tried all of the strategies to grow your revenue and it’s still not increasing, this FREE masterclass will help you easily get to the next level. I am sharing 3 extremely powerful manifestation techniques to help you manifest your first sale and double your revenue.
Business Manifestation is a massive passion of mine, and I have many more posts and videos to help you reach your goals so stick around and see what else I can help you with by checking out the links below.
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