Here is the truth about how to use detachment of the outcomes in manifestation to ALWAYS get what you desire. Here is my easy 5 step detachment process.
There is so much confusion around detachment when it comes to manifesting your desires.
Today I break down exactly what detachment is, why you need to detach, what you need to detach from, and how to detach.
I share my 5-step process to help you detach from things that are holding you back from manifestation of your desires.
I also share my own story about how I used my 5-step process to detach from a blockage so I could manifest my own desires.
You can either read this post below or listen to the audio version. Click the button below to listen to my podcast episode and click here to subscribe to my podcast.
You can also watch a summary of this post in the video below if you just want the highlights. Click here to subscribe to my Youtube channel.
I have now turned this series into a FREE Manifest Business Success Challenge. During each day of the challenge we will go deeper into each step of the steps to manifestation.
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In this challenge I will take you through the 10 steps of manifestation and how they can be applied to business.
Today we are focusing on Day 6 – How To Detach From Manifestation Of The Outcomes (5 Step Process)
10 Steps Of Manifesting Business Success
Here is a summary of the 10 steps:
- STEP 1 PEACE: How To Prepare For Manifesting (You Need To Do This First)
- STEP 2 DECIDE: How To Decide What To Manifest For Your Dream Business
- STEP 3 INTEND: How To Use The Power Of Intention To Claim Your Desires FAST
- STEP 4 CLARITY: How To Use Scripting For Success (This Changed My Entire Life)
- STEP 5 BELIEVE: How To Believe In Your Manifestation: 10 Steps To A New Belief System
- STEP 6 DETACH: How To Detach From Manifestation Of The Outcomes (5 Step Process)
- STEP 7 TRUST: How To Trust The Universe: 5 SURPRISING Law Of Attraction Tips
- STEP 8 ACT: Inspired Action Vs Action (The Dangers Of Waiting For Inspiration)
- STEP 9 UPLIFT: How To Use Gratitude To Get What You Want (Money, Business, Life)
- STEP 10 RECEIVE: How To Manifest Success By Living Your Purpose & Receiving Your Desires
Today You Will
- Learn the true meaning of detachment for manifestation
- Understand how your attachment is blocking your desires
- Discover how to let go of your attachment so you can manifest exactly what you want
My Name is Kath Kyle.
- I Help Content Creators And Changemakers Manifest Business Success Through Spirituality, Self-belief, And Strategy
- I Help You Master Your Marketing, Manifestation, And Money Mindset
Let me ask you a question…
- Struggling with disempowering thoughts that are holding you back?
- Doubting whether your desires will ever actually manifest?
Let me know what you are struggling with by leaving a comment on my blog, or send me a DM on Instagram.
Let’s change your struggles into solutions now…
Do You Want To…
- Be able to immediately recognize disempowering thoughts so you can let them go much more quickly
- Get rid of any blockages to you being able to manifest what you want
We need to start by identifying what it means to become too attached and too desperate about achieving your goals.
Things are about to get a little bit deep, and I for one love a deep conversation. If you are not quite following along with everything that I am saying, then stick with me because I have some examples and my own story coming up that will help to make things a lot clearer for you.
We are about to get into the subject of detachment, and it’s a concept that has many layers, so are you ready. You’ll probably want to pay full attention to this next bit so you can understand this fully.
What Is Detachment In Manifestation?
There is a lot of confusion around detachment in manifestation and I see it used in totally different ways.
You hear a lot of people saying “You can manifest anything you want. You can manifest all of your desires if you just believe it.” But in the next breath you hear people saying “You need to let go of attachment to your desires, detach otherwise you won’t manifest it”.
And this all sounds utterly confusing to most people. How do we trust, and let go at the same time? Why do we have to do this? What does this actually look like?
I’m going to share my take on what detachment means when we’re talking about manifestation.
Most people who are into manifestation would agree that you have to learn the principle of detachment if you want to be able to manifest successfully.
But what are we actually detaching from?
I hear a lot of people talk about detaching from your desires. They talk about letting go of the attachment to your desires so that you don’t feel desperate about something that you want.
A lot of people say that you can detach from your desires by thinking of a plan B to your desires. So you let go completely of your desires, and be totally OK with something else happening instead.
The reasoning is that you can’t manifest if you are feeling desperate, so to avoid feeling desperate you must let go of your desires.
And while that all seems to make sense, I could never really get my head around this principle, and I really struggled with this idea.
When I put it into practice, and I took my desires for wanting to be a successful entrepreneur and thought of a plan b, which was to get a job instead, that didn’t feel good to me. And while I know that if I had to go and get a job, I’d be OK and I’d still feel positive, I’d still be doing everything I could to get back to the world of business. So for me, the process of giving up being a full time entrepreneur to go back into the world of work would be a massive step backwards.
For other people who already have a full time job, transitioning to becoming an entrepreneur would be a step forwards for them, but I just want you to know that this is how I personally feel about adopting a plan b for my desires.
So I just couldn’t get on board with this principle of detaching from one of my core desires.
What is a core desire, and why is this important?
What Is A Core Desire?
A core desire is the highest level of desire, and it is often who you see yourself as or who you desire to see yourself as.
Everybody has lots of core desires. These might also be called personality traits.
They are how you see yourself. They should also be positive in nature.
You might have negative labels for yourself, but these are just disbelief in your core desires.
Some examples of core desires might be as follows:
- A successful entrepreneur
- A loving parent
- A helpful daughter
- An abundant human
- A high achiever
- A passionate learner
- A healthy person
- An ethical citizen
One of my core desires is to be an entrepreneur. It is who I see myself as, and I feel like I always will be. I feel like this is my purpose in the world of work, so I just don’t even want to contemplate a plan b for this core desire.
I do understand the need to let go of feeling desperate, but I think there are other ways to do this without letting go of your core desires.
I believe that core desires are placed on your heart by the divine, and I feel in true alignment with this calling. I don’t see any need to let go or detach from my core desires.
I wrestled with this principle for a long time until I heard someone explain detachment another way, and this made perfect sense to me.
Detachment Is Releasing The Blocks To Your Desired Outcomes And Releasing The Need To Get This Exact outcome
Another way to look at detachment is that in order to manifest your desires, you have to detach from your blockages to your desires. You have to let go of anything that is holding you back from your core desires.
And that sits with me a lot better.
For example, if I see myself as a successful business owner, and I have a desire to start a YouTube channel, and I would feel successful if I were to start a YouTube channel, if I felt like I wasn’t good enough to start a YouTube channel, and therefore didn’t start one, I am not only blocking my manifestations, but I’m not accepting who I am at the core.
If I truly believed that I was a successful entrepreneur and that a YouTube channel was the way to get there, I would have a YouTube channel.
However, another way to look at this is that yes I am a successful entrepreneur, but I don’t feel like I HAVE to start a YouTube channel to be successful. My success can come in a variety of ways. But I’m open to all of them, and I’m going to follow my desires. And if I desire to start a YouTube channel, I will do that.
Let Go Of The Control Of Your Manifestations
A further way to look at detachment which I really like is to let go of the control over achieving a particular outcome that fits within your core desire.
So for example, my core desire is to be a successful entrepreneur. Having a successful business is really something that is just determined by me. If I want to start a business, I simply start one by saying that I’ve started one and convincing myself that I have started a business by taking some kind of action like starting a new Instagram account, and if I decide that my business is successful, it is successful. Success is all in the mind and it is subjective.
So, although this desire was placed there by God, and I agree with it, it turns out that I don’t actually need a great deal of help from God or The Universe to manifest being a successful entrepreneur, as I simply need to make the decision that I am one. I just choose to see myself in that way and then it is so.
So when we talk about manifestation, we are not really talking about manifesting being a particular kind of person, we are talking about manifesting a particular outcome or goal that is out of our control.
So whereas, I have total control over my own thoughts, my own perception of myself, and my own actions, i.e. my core desires, I don’t have control over what other people think of my business, whether they want to pay me, how many customers I have, how many followers I have, and how much money they want to pay me.
To me, those are all outcomes that I need to manifest, or in other words, I need to ask for and accept help from a power greater than myself to manifest these things.
So if I have a particular attachment to something which is out of my control, then yes I think it is a good idea to accept that you don’t have control over this, you want it, and you are ready to receive it, but if you don’t have the exact number of customers you wanted to manifest, then you can still look back to your core desires and know that everything is working out for you because you are still successful because you decided that your success is not determined by the number of customers that you have.
What we need to do is let go of the need to achieve a particular outcome, because our core desires are still present.
No matter how much money I make, or how many followers I have on social media, I can still choose to believe in my core desire which is to see myself as a successful entrepreneur.
If you got 99 customers instead of the 100 you were trying to manifest this month, can you still see yourself as a successful business owner?
Or if you got 10 customers instead of 100, but those 10 customers paid you 10 times more, could you still see yourself as a successful business owner?
If you decide that yes, you are still a successful business owner, then you are still in total alignment with your core desires.
There is no need to detach from your core desire.
But it is a good idea to detach from the outcome of desperately wanting something out of your control.
The reason it is good to detach from particular outcomes is because none of them should change how you see yourself.
Does it matter if you get your customers from Instagram or from Youtube? If people suddenly started finding you from a different marketing channel, can you still see yourself as a successful entrepreneur?
If the answer is yes then the outcome isn’t really as important as you might think it is.
The way in which outcomes are achieved really doesn’t matter at all in the grand scheme of things.
As long as you keep seeing yourself as successful, you will find that you WILL get the outcomes you want and much more often because you are in alignment with your core desires.
So yes it’s a good idea to detach from outcomes out of your control that don’t really matter all that much anyway, but not to detach from your core desire.
So here is a summary of the point I’m making
It is a good idea to detach from any blockages you have from either your core desire or a particular outcome you want to manifest. And it makes sense to loosen any attachment you have to an outcome that is out of your control and doesn’t really matter. It is also good to accept that the achievement of your goal should never change your core desire.
But what we don’t want to do is detach from our core desires. This is who you are. You never want to lose attachment to that unless you are truly ready to gracefully let go of previous core desires because they are no longer core desires.
For example, it is perfectly OK to decide that you no longer want to be an entrepreneur if you’ve come to that decision from a place of peace, and there is literally no desire left to ever be this kind of person.
Today I’m going to show you my process of detaching from any disbelief that is blocking your belief in your core desires, or in the manifestations of your desired outcomes.
I’m also going to share a quick story of how I personally used my own process to let go of disbelief that was blocking me from living my purpose.
How I Learned To Detach From My Disbelief
I just wanted to walk you through an example of a time where I used my 5 step process to let go of my own disbelief so I could become the person I was supposed to be.
I already had set up several YouTube channels in the past, and I’d never say any of them really took off in a massive way, probably because they weren’t my core focus in my previous businesses, and I was never all that consistent with them.
However, I did desire to have a very successful YouTube channel for my new brand, Kath Kyle, and I kept getting excited about YouTube trainings and learning all of the latest strategies.
However, there was something holding me back in a big way.
Due to an accident that I had when I was a kid, I had knocked two of my front teeth, and I had numerous surgeries on these teeth and gums over the years. When we moved into our new house, I was right at the end of a long line of surgeries, but I was supposed to be having some new teeth inserted into my gum. I’d already had the screw of the implant placed into the gum, and the last stage was to have the crowns fitted which were going to be my new teeth.
However, we then entered lockdown and the dentists actually had to close down for a very long time. Even when they opened, they couldn’t fit me in, and it will probably be about 2 years in total that I’ve been waiting for these crowns. In the meantime, I have this big hole in my gum, and the metal screw is quite obvious when I smile.
I really didn’t like looking at myself in the mirror. The state of my mouth had left me feeling really self-confident about the way I looked and I had stopped smiling in a really big way. I’m normally a really big smiler.
So I decided that obviously I couldn’t start a YouTube channel with my mouth in such a state. I had no choice but to focus on blogging, and not create any videos until I got my mouth fixed otherwise I would disgust people.
I focused my attention on writing a book and I created numerous blog posts.
But that desire to have a successful YouTube channel just kept niggling at me. I kept pushing it away saying to it, don’t be silly, you know now is not the right time for that.
And one day I decided to stop myself in my tracks and ask myself a few questions.
Are there any advantages of not doing a YouTube channel right now?
Yes, the advantages are that I have an excuse when my business isn’t successful enough. I can say that I’ve had to put my outreach on hold because of situations outside of my control.
Other advantages are that I don’t have to work on my mindset. I don’t have to work on being stronger or more confident. I can settle with feeling comfortable right now.
So now I’ve found some subtle advantages that might be holding me back.
Now I moved on to the next stage of the process which is asking whether or not my reasons for not doing videos are really true.
Is it really true that I can’t do YouTube videos just because my teeth look a bit weird at the moment?
No, of course it isn’t true. If I stop to answer this question logically, there are plenty of people on YouTube who are less than perfect looking who are not only putting themselves out there, but are also being very successful.
So I decided I was going to release the disbelief. I wrote down my disbelief, and I let go of it. I decided this belief was no longer mine.
Now I decided to create some new affirmations to help me replace the disbelief with a new belief system.
These are some of the affirmations that I told myself.
“You are beautiful from the inside out. Your beauty shines on the outside because you are beautiful on the inside”
“You are the only person who notices your imperfections.”
“People will be drawn to my content because of the value I’m giving them, not because of how I look”.
“There are always solutions to all problems. If I don’t feel comfortable doing normal YouTube videos, there are plenty of ways around this”.
I repeated these affirmations over and over for about a month, and some interesting things started to happen as a result.
- I noticed a lot of different YouTube videos that were popular without somebody even appearing on them
- I figured out a new way to smile without showing my gums
- I really started to see myself as more beautiful
- I decided to put helping people before my own discomfort
- I felt drawn to creating TikTok videos
- I bought a new phone with a camera that made me look really good, and didn’t draw any attention to my teeth
- I decided that if I desired to reach people with video, then I had to step into that reality
So I started creating YouTube videos. I tried a variety of different styles, and to be honest, so far, I’ve not had a great response on Youtube as yet. I feel like part of me is still telling myself that I need to do high definition videos on YouTube to be successful, and I’m not quite ready for my HD camera yet. Despite me putting out a lot of YouTube videos, I rarely got any views on any of them, and I think my follower count has only grown by about 8 in the last 6 months.
So that clearly isn’t’ a success story just yet. But it is important for me to share my whole journey with you, the ups and the downs, and I still believe that I will be successful on Youtube.
Sometimes things happen in unexpected ways at unexpected times.
I felt called to do TikTok videos and to be honest I felt way more excited about that than I did about YouTube. At first I wasn’t seeing very much success either, but I kept going, and now I have over 600 followers in just a couple of months. So I’m thrilled with this growth.
Some of my videos to date have got over 13,000 views on this brand new account. So I know that people are liking my content, and my teeth don’t seem to be an issue.
Another funny thing happened. I took these same short videos and started sharing them on a brand new YouTube channel specifically for my short videos, called Short on YouTube, and already they are getting views after just a couple of days.
So this just goes to show what happens when you reject your disbelief, and you keep trusting and remain committed to the process.
5 Steps To Detaching From Disbelief
Now I’m going to share my 5-step process with you for detaching from and rejecting disbelief. This is a technique taken from my STAMP Goals book. I go into the process in way more detail in my book and go through all of the common struggles that entrepreneurs face. But for now, I am going to describe all the steps a lot more briefly.
1) Identify The Disbelief
What you need to do first is to look at your goals, or things you want to manifest. You should have decided this in step 2 of the manifestation process. If you’ve not done step 2, go back to that stage of the manifestation process. This is all in my challenge, so click here to opt-in and get the whole process.
Now grab your journal or some paper, and answer the following questions:
- What could stop you from achieving these goals?
- Why are you not the type of person who achieves these kinds of goals?
- What scares you or worries you about these goals?
- What could prevent you from getting started with these goals?
- What disbelief are you feeling when you read your goals?
- What objections do you have with regard to achieving your goals?
2) Analyze The Disbelief
Now that we’ve uncovered some disbelief in achieving your goals, we need to analyze it and see if there are any positive reasons that you don’t want to achieve your goal.
Can you think of any advantages of not achieving your goals?
You might initially think there are no advantages in not achieving your goals, but here are a few suggestions that might get you thinking.
Will it bring anything unwanted in your life? More stress, public speaking, unwanted attention?
3) Is The Disbelief True?
Here’s a question that most people never stop and ask themselves about their beliefs.
Is it true?
How do you know that it is definitely true?
Just stop for a moment and ask yourself these questions.
- Is it the truth?
- Could there be some other truth?
- Do you want to believe this?
- Is there another way to achieve your goals?
After over a decade of being in business, I can categorically say that most of your beliefs around building a successful business are not true.
I know for a fact it is possible to build a very successful business without having to do any of the things that you don’t want to do.
You can be a successful business owner without worrying you’re going to have to do something very unpleasant. Let’s unpack some of the most common misbeliefs and see if they are really true.
I know that all of your fears are not actually the truth. And that is because I overcame most of these myself to build many successful businesses. Fear stands for False Evidence Appearing Real.
What I’ve learned over the years is that you can make up your own rules for success in your business. You do not have to do things in a certain way to be successful. You can just focus on what you love to do, I promise you, the desires you have will find a way to manifest in your business if you believe it.
4) Release The Disbelief
Are you now ready to let go of some of your fears, worries and reasons for not growing a successful business?
Now we are going to get rid of this disbelief for good so you can finally move on with your passions and put your stamp on the world.
I have another question for you.
Who would you be without those negative thoughts? Who would you be without your fear? What would you have achieved if you chose not to believe the thoughts that are holding you back?
Tools For Releasing Disbelief
If you feel ready to let go of your disbelief, then I have several different tools that can help you do this that I describe in my book. But right now I’m going to simply things and just talk about one of these tools.
The STAMP box has a double function and a double meaning. This is a box that you have in your house. Any type of box will do. I bought a lovely wooden tissue holder box specifically for this purpose.
What you do is you write your fears, or disbelief on a small piece of paper. Then you throw it into the STAMP box. Once it’s in the STAMP box, the disbelief has gone. You’ve let go of it and you never bring it back into your life again.
I started off calling my box, my God Box. This really helped my kids to understand the principle that they give their fears to God. God takes care of them and protects them from any harm so they don’t have to worry anymore.
It worked wonders for us all. We were all using it multiple times while we were in the process of selling our house and moving, as so many challenges, blockages and fears appeared in our path that we had to let go of.
I love the name STAMP for this box as you can STAMP out your fears and disbelief by putting them into the box. You could also call it a STAMP IT OUT box.
Then, soon after we moved, my daughter made me a lovely gift for my birthday. A positive god box. She said it was for praying for things that you want. You write down your goals or dreams on pieces of paper and give those to God too knowing that he brings all your desires to you when the timing is right.
I love that we have 2 boxes now as it was such a lovely reminder that my 8-year-old daughter is such a positive person and thinks in very similar ways to me which I love.
But for you, one box would work just as well for both purposes. You can use the term STAMP for manifesting your goals to help you put your STAMP on the world. You can also use the box to STAMP out the disbelief that prevents you from reaching your goals. You don’t just have to use the box for goal setting, you can use it for any negative beliefs you want to let go of and any desires that you want to manifest into your life.
In my book bonuses I also give you some STAMP It Out notes and Put Your STAMP On The World note templates for you to print out and put in your own STAMP Box.
5) Replace The Disbelief
Now it’s time to take your disbelief and reframe it into a statement of unwavering faith.
These statements will become your affirmations and your personal manifesto.
Along with thoughts, are there any actions you can take right now that would make it easier to think positive thoughts about your business?
For example, you could be worried that you don’t have enough revenue to pay your bills. This disbelief about money could lead you to give up on your business entirely. Is there something you could do in the short term to earn money? Could you get a part-time job? Could you sell your services while you are creating your first product? Do whatever it takes to have an attitude of always having enough money. Feel grateful for every penny you receive. See your business revenue as a bonus that you are grateful for. Never be fearful you will lose your business. If you take an attitude of gratitude, you’ll always have enough money to pay your bills.
Here are some examples of Brain Stamps (I am affirmations) that you could use if you are worrying about money.
- I always have enough money for everything I need and so much more
- I always receive 10 times more money than I spend
- I am always receiving more money from a variety of different sources
Now that you have learned how to detach from the manifestation of the outcomes and blockages of your desires, you might be finding it difficult to trust that your manifestations are actually going to come true. Next time, I’m going to help you work on your trust muscle so you can start to believe that your dreams really can come true for you.
Detaching is step 6 in the process of manifestation. You can get all 10 steps in the Manifesting process by signing up for my FREE Manifest Business Success Challenge here if you haven’t already.
Join the challenge while it is still free because I am in the process of turning this content into a book.
While you’re waiting for the next step in the manifestation process, you can start taking practical action in your business today.
Watch my FREE workshop where I walk you through my complete process of planning the business of your dreams in just 30 days.
This is part of my premium course, Dream Business Blueprint, and I’m only making this workshop free for a limited time because, so grab that while it is still available.
Manifestation is a massive passion of mine, and I have many more posts and videos to help you reach your goals so stick around and see what else I can help you with by checking out the links below.
Related Resources You Will Love
- How To Detach From Manifestation Of The Outcomes (5 Step Process)
- How To Trust The Universe: 5 SURPRISING Law Of Attraction Tips
- Inspired Action Vs Action (The Dangers Of Waiting For Inspiration)
- How To Use Gratitude To Get What You Want (Money, Business, Life)
- How To Manifest Success By Living Your Purpose & Receiving Your Desires
FREE Business Goal Setting For FAST Results WORKSHOP
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